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 DUMB
MEN JOKES
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Our Dumb men jokes will leave you rolling in laughter
at the male species! Did we miss a Dumb Men joke that maybe
you have?
Submit it to us and we'll add it to our popular men related
jokes category! |
Why do men think they're so superior if they have to become men
while women just are?
Q:What is the best way to get a man to stop pestering you?
A:Stare at his crotch and laugh.
Q:Why do men have to flex their muscles around women so much?
A:Because they have nothing else to brag about.
Q:If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman to hear him,
is he still wrong?
A:YES!!!
Q:Why do men never stop to ask for directions?
A:Because they aren't lost, they just don't know where they are.
3 ways to have fun with men:
1.tell him that this girl he likes wants a kiss
2.take out the batteries on the remote and then tell him that a
Football game is on
3.wait till the first two are complete, then innocently tell him
that you thought he knew better.
Once there were
three construction workers. When it was lunchtime one day, they
all sat down together.
The first one opened his lunchbox and said, "Eeew, turkey!
I hate turkey!" So he shot himself with a rivet gun.
The second one opened his lunchbox and said, "Eeew, ham! I
hate ham!" So he jumped off the building.
The third one opened his box and said, "Eeew, mac and cheese!
I hate mac and cheese!" So he ran himself over with a bulldozer.
At the funeral, their three wives were talking about their lost
husbands. The first two were very sad, but the third was rather
puzzled.
The first wife said, "I thought he liked turkey!"
The second one said, "I thought he liked ham!"
But the third one was still puzzled. She said, "I thought he
packed his own lunch."
There were three guys on top of the cn tower, and they met a genie,
the genie said I will give you one wish each, what you wish for
you will jump off and land in it. the first guy wished to land in
gold, so off he jumped and landed in gold, the second guy wished
for lots of money he landed in money, the third guy said I wish
for,,, Oh man I forget, oh crap, and with out Knowing he landed
in a pile of crap.
I think my wife is selling drugs! Yesterday I was running a little
bit late for work and the phone rang. I answered it. Before I could
say anything a male voice on the line said, Hey honey is that DOPE
gone yet?
How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who
cares!!!
A man walks into a bar and finds a Genie in a lamp. The Genie will
only grant him one wish. The man wishes to be a million times smarter
than any man on earth. *POOF* the Genie turns him into a woman!
Q: Why do men have slits in their underware?
A: So they can get oxygen to their brains.
Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually active?
A: He's breathing!
Q: How many men does it take to make popcorn?
A: Four, one to hold the pot, and three to act macho and shake the
stove.
Q. How do you save a man from drowning?
A. Take your foot off of his head.
Q. How are men like parking spaces?
A. The good ones are always taken and all that is left are handicapped
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