 WINTER
JOKES
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The
Indians asked their Chief in autumn if the winter was going to
be cold or not. Not really knowing an answer, the chief replies
that the winter was going to be cold and that the members of the
village were to collect wood to be prepared.
Being
a good leader, he then went to the next phone booth and called
the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter to
be cold?"
The
man on the phone responded, "This winter is going to be quite
cold indeed."
So
the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more
wood to be prepared. A week later he called the National Weather
Service again, "Is it going to be a very cold winter?"
"Yes",
the man replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
So
the Chief goes back to his people and orders them to go and find
every scrap of wood they can find. Two weeks later he calls the
National Weather Service again: "Are you absolutely sure
that the
winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely,"
the man replies, "the Indians are collecting wood like crazy!"
Q:
Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than a regular
one?
A:
You have to hollow out the head.
A
bird was flying south for Winter, but he had left it too late
and was frozen solid in a storm.
He dropped down into a pasture of cows. The biggest, fattest cow
was doing a crap there, and the bird landed in it. At first he
was disgusted, until he realised the poo was thawing him out!
He started crying out for joy as the ice melted. A cat that was
nearby heard the cries, walked over, saw the bird and ate it
There
are three morals to this story:
1.
Not everyone who gets you into shit is your enemy
2.
Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3.
If you are in shit, keep your mouth shut
Peekaboo
Street (the US Olympian) apparently came into a lot of money
because of her Olympic performance this winter. Rather than spend
it
on herself, she showed a lot of character by donating it to a
local
hospital. The primary facility the hospital needed was a retrofit
of
the Intensive Care Unit, so in her honor, the hospital board is
going
to name the new unit, "Peekaboo, I.C.U."
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