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BORING PARTY JOKES

Speak in a strange foreign accent. when someone asks where you are from, name a country only you can pronounce.

Use a different accent every time you talk to someone new.

When getting food, pile everything onto your plate in heaping servings - make sure to use your hands!

Ask the host, "Who threw this cheesy party, anyway?"

Turn cartwheels across the floor. If you can turn a back flip, all the better!

Bring a novel and curl up in a corner with it.

Cough all over guests, then exclaim, "Doctor says a few more years and I'll be cured..."

Hang your head and whisper one-word answers to questions.

Play a lullaby on a kazoo during a speech (singing a lullaby works okay, too)

If there is music, mix up your dancing: break dance to classical, symphony conductor hand waves to techno music.

If you find your former dancing partner dancing with someone else, burst into tears, wailing "I thought you loved me!", and run from the room.

Tell a middle-aged wife, "Your husband seems very happy with that girl in the closet..."

Tell a middle aged man, "Your wife seems very happy with that boy in the closet..."

Whisper to the guest on your right, "What kind of lame moron actually goes to these parties, anyway?"

Bring Lego warships and fighter jets. Wage a war in the middle of the room. Urge other guests to get involved. If you are a historical expert, reenact the revolutionary war, the civil war, world war two, etc.

Bring a soccer ball, basketball, football, or baseball. Start a game... in the kitchen.

Karate chop everywhere and everything. Yell really, really loud. A few sudden kicks would be worthwhile as well.

Wear wool or feathers and sneeze all night. "The doctor says I'm not allergic to anything except sheep and birds..."

If someone says the word no to you, say, "How dare you turn down the prince / princess of Ugranialo!"

Burst into the room an hour late, sopping wet and screaming, "I've done it! I've found Atlantis!"

Pick out the oldest women at the party, run up to her, and exclaim, "Grandmother! it's me, Anastasia!"

If it is a summer party in the evening, break into a duet with another guest: "Summer nights". Persuade the host to sing "You're the one that I want" with you.

Come in saying, the guy outside in the lab coat is looking for (insert name of host).

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